Alexander's Bad Day Buddies

Wise authors are looking back at classic children's literature and realizing their value. Below I have for you 3 recently published books with plots and themes very similar to Judith Viorst's 1972 classic Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. Don't know Alexander? Here's my PBT post about this classic! 

The healthy messages of these books are particularly important during this global pandemic! Acknowledging our feelings (confusion, anger, grief, sadness...) at home, school, and in religious settings will lead to better mental health for everyone. Here's a PBT post about that. It addresses the social-emotional needs of very young children via a theological statement that can be inserted into a secular book about feelings, BUT many books I feature there work for older children as well.

Also, I want you to know about 2 other books here if you only want to talk about sadness. Perhaps your congregation is grieving a loss or significant change. Click on titles to read posts about these very different PBT books: 

The Blue Day Book for Kids

When Sadness is at Your Door

Now back to Alexander's literary influence... 

Below find some information about how the 3 new books photographed above are different from Viorst's classic. In general, there is less text in all 3 books so they are quicker reads. From the covers, you'll see the diversity they offer. At the bottom, I give a few ideas about how these books tie to scripture and might be used in ministry.

Picture Book: Keep Your Head UP

Author: Aliya King Neil

Illustrator: Charly Palmer

Summary: This beautiful book is quite similar to Alexander, but it has the wisdom of some modern psychology. D. is a little older, a tween or young teen. D. reminds himself that "Any day can be good if you try." And he does try, but the frustrations of home and school pile on him. When D. has a "meltdown," he is sent to the principal's office, where he is greeted by Miss King, who has been helping him. Her role is unclear, likely a school counselor or school psychologist. D.'s family is also helpful. They set reasonable limits, talk openly about his feelings, and encourage him to "Keep his head up." When he doesn't want to, D. knows he can at least try.

Hanna’s Comments: In addition to the very real details and modern school setting, loving home, and non-white characters, what I like most about this book is the way D. is perceptive about his feelings and specific about their effects. He says he feels scrunchy and describes his face changes (scrunchy eyebrows). He even describes a meltdown! (see image above) There is some great information for discussion here! Do tell your audience that we can't always be expected to keep trying to feel better. Sometime we have to accept our feelings while maintaining control of our behavior. Offering ideas of "loving our neighbors" is important to add here.

Original Publisher: Simon & Schuster, 2021

Age Appropriateness: 5 and up

Formats other than Book: Tablet

 

Picture Book: Benji, the Bad Day, and Me

Author: Sally J. Pla

Illustrator: Ken Min

Summary: Here the most significant and welcome difference from Viorst's classic is that the main character is an older brother to a child on the autism spectrum. This difference offers opportunities to talk about the importance of empathy, prioritizing people's needs, and concepts of fairness & justice. Although the older brother's  day has gone terribly, his mother is very focused on her younger child's significant needs. It is the younger brother who finally offers comfort to the main character. Then mom, who no doubt needs comfort too,  joins in, and the story ends beautifully.

Hanna’s Comments: It is the younger brother who is named Benji. This is confusing. Benji is a pivotal but mostly peripheral character. The older brother, who is telling the story, is Samuel. I suggest giving their names when showing the cover before reading. Whenever I find myself occupied with trying to figure out who is who, I am not able to focus on a story. 

Original Publisher: Lee & Low, 2018

Age Appropriateness: 5 and up

Formats other than Book: None at present 

Picture Book: Kevin the Unicorn: It’s Not All Rainbows

Author/Illustrator: Jessica von Innerebner

Summary: Alexander and Kevin's worlds are about as different as they can be! Kevin is expected to be perfect and everyday is expected to be sparkly - "filled with MAGICAL AWESOMENESS!" But Kevin, like Alexander, D. and Samuel, is having a bad day. Although he tries to be joyful, the constant barrage of positive messages in Kevin's world only confuse him. Eventually, he can no longer hide his feelings. His declaration invites others to be more honest about the bad day they are having. Kevin is not alone in his feelings. Such connections are crucial to humans and even unicorns, I suspect!

Hanna’s Comments: I must admit, this cover and title turned me off. But then I read the story! What wisdom there is between the lines of this silly and saccharine book! As an Enneagram 7, it is a story I needed. You have children who need to hear that it is acceptable and inevitable to be imperfect and upset, and to have a bad day. This book is full of funny word play. Read it with drama and silliness. But before reading, invite your audience to notice minor characters and consider how their days are going. Turn pages slowly so they can comprehend detail. 

Given the color palate, I hope you won't assume this is a book for girls only. The main character is named Keven, after all. At present, there is another book about Kevin the Unicorn: Why Can’t We Be Bestie-Corns?

Original Publisher: Dial Books, 2019

Age Appropriateness: 4 and up

Formats other than Book: Tablet

Scripture Connections for these 3 books: Any scripture that involves Lamentation or Complaint to God connects to these books.

OR Bible stories about characters that are suffering, such as Job, can be particularly powerful. Try not to get into why bad things happen. 

OR Get into the details of The Great Commandment. What does it means to love yourself AND love your neighbor when you are having a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day?

PBT Applications: Read any of these books to dive into what lament looks like. Legitimize it as an important kind of prayer. Talk about how there is a whole book in the Bible named Lamentations and how many of the Psalms include  complaints to God. More importantly, emphasize that God and those who love us most, want to know our real feelings. They can handle our negative feelings and can likely help us understand or move through them better. Sometimes just saying, "I am having a bad day!" is enough to help us feel better!

Sadness as a Companion

Today is Good Friday, the day we remember the crucifixion of Jesus. I've never understood why we call it good. It seems like a very sad day to me. This newly published book could be used throughout the year in your ministry or at your home or school, particularly when a sad event occurs and affects many. In American culture, we run from sadness. Today I want to feature this intriguing book that teaches us to acknowledge and befriend sadness. We might even need to invite sadness to stay for a while.

Picture Book: When Sadness is at Your Door
Authors  & Illustrator: Eva Eland
Summary: Striking illustrations of sadness personified are found immediately in the inside covers to begin and end Eland's book.

Sadness enters a child's home unexpectedly. At first the child is unsure and puzzled.

Sadness follows and seems to need comfort in a way that is uncomfortable and even scary.

Hiding it doesn't work,

because in some sense you've become sadness yourself.

Perhaps it is best to face it, name it, and listen. Ask it what it needs. It's okay if you don't understand or can't help it just now.

You might have to simply be a companion 

or sadness might just need time and beauty

and welcoming attention.

Someday it will be gone and you will have a new day.

Hanna’s Comments: During my 2 year Academy for Spiritual Formation, a book was assigned in which personification of personal issues - everything from emotions to addictions - was explained as a powerful tool for spiritual growth and healing. The question, "What does it need?" was crucial. Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love speaks of such personification in a delightful TED talk and writes about it in her book on creativity Big Magic. I have experienced such healing myself. Social science has long said that emotional literacy is crucial for emotional development. Our places of worship and families of faith are important environments for this kind of learning and healing to occur, but they must be safe, trustworthy places. 
When might this book be appropriate? 

When a much-loved member or teacher dies

When a national tragedy occurs as in Paris this week

When a pastor struggles with clinical depression or terminal illness

When many in your church are near the end of their lives

When a global church makes a decision that shuts-out many

When much has been lost across a congregation as in a major change or disaster

When your client or spiritual directee is stuck and needing a creative invitation

When Good Friday is not really so good

Demystifying sadness can be a gift to your children and all members of your classroom or congregation if handled delicately and respectfully, with no judgement or impatience. Don't view this as a way to get over sadness but as a way to companion it and be mindful of it. Find personal connections in the loss, fear, and confusion. Offer hints of hope. For this book, I would simply read it and then listen. Some gentle questions and art supplies might be good to have handy too.

Original Publisher & Date: Random House, 2019

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 3 and up, Pre and up

Formats other than Book: Tablet

Scripture Connections: There are many Bible stories that have elements of sadness besides those we hear in anticipation of Good Friday. Consider the sadness that must have been felt by Ruth, the friends of Tabitha/Dorcas, David at the death of Jonathan, and Martha, Mary, and Jesus upon Lazarus' death. Sparingly use scriptures about hope such as I am making all things new (Revelation 21:5) since this is a book about sadness being acknowledged and respected in the present.

Idea(s) for Application: Besides the ideas mentioned above, read this book to a group of children when learning about God's presence when we are sad. 

PBT Series Grab & Go #11 - 14 Cows for America

The anniversary of the tragedy of 9/11/2001 is nearing so I thought I’d offer a repost of an inspirational story resulting from that event.  Today my feature is a part of the PBT Grab & Go Series featuring books that would be easy lessons for faith families. 14 Cows for America quickly inspires thinking and conversation about compassion, generosity, and international relationships. This picture book was offered in a Dynamic Duo during PBT's first year. I paired it with another story in which Africans responded generously to American suffering. Check out that post [here].

Picture Book: 14 Cows for America

Author: Carmen Agra Deedy

Illustrator: Thomas Gonzalez

Collaborator: Wilson Kimeli Naiyomah

Summary: Months after the World Trade Towers were destroyed, a Kenyan student, who was in New York City on that day, returned to his beloved Maasai tribe and shared the story. Greatly affected by the terrible events, Kimeli asked the elders to ceremoniously bless the giving of his only cow, a valuable gift. For the Maasai, the cow is life. This ritual is seen as a way of taking on some of America’s pain. Moved by the story, the elders agreed. When an American diplomat came to the blessing ceremony, his country was given not 1 but 14 cows. This true story of international compassion and generosity has been shared around the globe and continues to inspire. 

Hanna’s Comments: Although this story is about Kenyan Maasai and the USA, it is a story that can bless those in any community in which international connections are valued and compassion ignores borders. Be sure to read Kimeli’s Afterward. This book is the first in a PBT Dynamic Duo. Tomorrow’s PBT offering is another picture book involving an African tribe’s desire to give to a suffering New York City during The Great Depression of the 1930s.  

Original Publisher & Date: Peachtree Publishers, 2009

Age and Grade Appropriateness:  7 and up, 2nd and up

Available in Spanish? Yes

Formats other than Book: Find more information at www.14cowsforamerica.com, including a Teacher’s Guide and news of the flag commemorating this gift.

Scripture Connections: Giving to the poor (Proverbs 19:17, 25:21, 28:27), To the least of these (Matthew 25), the Gentile churches give to the suffering in the Jerusalem church (Romans 15: 22-29, 1 Corinthians 16:1-4, 2 Corinthians 8: 1-15)

Idea(s) for Application: Read this book as part of a sermon or lesson about giving across international borders when a community is suffering.

PBT Blog Series: Theological Statements for Young Children #5

Illustration from When Sophie Gets Angry - Really, Really Angry by Molly Bang

The 5^th PBT theological statement for young children is: Feelings are not good or bad. What matters is how you act on your feelings.

For this post I’m offering lots of books for young children about feelings. Because there are so many, I’ll not go into detail about each book. Instead I’ll tell you how they are unique or particularly beneficial for young children to experience. Also, I might suggest a way to use the book.

Illustration from When Sophie Gets Angry - Really, Really Angry by Molly Bang

Then I’ll list the PBT books that I have already posted on this blog. My favorites of all are the 2 Molly Bang books which I posted about earlier this year on February 12, 2016. The two illustrations above and the one below give you a little taste of the quality of these books. A range of emotions are dealt with here, not just anger as the title of the first one might indicate. 

Being able to identify and put labels on feelings is a crucial first step for children (and adults!) to understand them. Then talk about appropriate ways and inappropriate ways to express their feelings. Everyone benefits when children (and adults!) can do this and then learn to work through their feelings appropriately. 

The first PBT book I offer is part of a series called The Way I Feel Books. There is a Note to Parents at the beginning and the multiple situations are very young child oriented. Besides this book in the series, the titles I found are listed next. There are lots of PBT possibilities in this series! All have the same initial author.

When I Feel Sad

When I Feel Jealous

When I Feel Worried

When I Feel Scared

When I Miss You

When I Feel Good about Myself

When I Care about Others

Picture Book: When I Feel Angry

Author: Cornelia Maude Spelman

Illustrator: Nancy Cote

Original Publisher & Date: Whitman & Co., 2000

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 2 and up, Toddler and up

Formats other than Book: Tablet

The next offering is a new book that’s great for encouraging adults to tell children that they too struggle with controlling their actions when they have strong feelings. This book’s text and illustrations use lots of fun similes such as “stubborn as a mule” or “clumsy as an ox” and emphasize that everyone (even adults!) feels these ways sometimes.

Picture Book: Wild Feelings

Author & Illustrator: David Milgrim

Original Publisher & Date: Holt & Co., 2015

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 4 and up, Pre and up

Formats other than Book: Tablet

Actress Jamie Lee Curtis writes a wonderful selection of books that children really enjoy. On 12/4/14 I featured on PBT Is There Really a Human Race? Remember to look up earlier PBT posts by going to the Archive files on the right side bar. Click on the year and month. Then use the tabs at the bottom to go to newer posts or older posts. I have over 400 books on this blog for your benefit!

Curtis’ book about feelings has a girl’s point of view so some boys may not appreciate it. Girls will absolutely love it though! Cornell’s illustrations are very fun and full of details.

Picture Book: Today I Feel Silly & Other Moods That Make My Day

Author: Jamie Lee Curtis

Illustrator: Laura Cornell

Original Publisher & Date: Harper Collins, 1998

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 4 and up, Pre and up

Formats other than Book: Not at present

Several times here at PBT, I’ve mentioned Todd Parr’s brightly colored and simply perfect books for young children. Note that there is a board book version of this feelings book and it has a set of corresponding Feelings Flashcards that you can purchase on Amazon.

Picture Book: The Feelings Book

Author & Illustrator: Todd Parr

Original Publisher & Date: Little, Brown, & Co. 2000

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 2 and up, Toddler and up

Formats other than Book: Tablet

This next book is quite old but not dated. It has lots of detailed illustrations and small text. You may want to read this book over a series of experiences and with a small number of children to allow them to see the illustrations and talk with you about their own feelings and experiences. Aliki (Aliki Brandenberg) has several other great books for young children including one on manners, one on growing, and one on hands. Her illustrations are often the jewels of her books.

Picture Book: Feelings

Author & Illustrator: Aliki

Original Publisher & Date: William Morrow & Co., 1984

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 4 and up, Pre and up

Formats other than Book: Not at present

The next feelings book offers wonderful and large illustrations over a series of situations and feelings with different children. There’s a companion book by another author but still illustrated by Janan Cain called The Way I Act.

Picture Book: The Way I Feel

Author & Illustrator: Janan Cain

Original Publisher & Date: Parenting Press, 2000

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 3 and up, Pre and up

Formats other than Book: Not at present

This book began as lyrics to a song written by award winning children’s recording artist, Laurie Berkner. My version has a CD inside the book. The illustrations are fun, and it’s about accepting all sorts of feelings. The score and text to 4 verses are in the back of the book.

Picture Book: The Story of My Feelings

Author: Laurie Berkner  

Illustrator: Caroline Jayne Church

Original Publisher & Date: Orchard Books, 2007

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 3 and up, Pre and up

Formats other than Book: Not at present

The last two books are both by Mo Willems, a favorite picture book author and illustrator. I offer one from each of his two popular series for young children. His books are more about the characters and plot than the teaching of feelings so you’ll have to offer your own instruction in the context of the characters’ feelings. Be sure to point out all characters’ feelings and note how they change as plots develop. The first comes in a board book version.

Picture Book: The Pigeon Has Feelings Too!

Author & Illustrator: Mo Willems

Original Publisher & Date: Hyperion, 2005

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 2 and up, Toddler and up

Formats other than Book: None at present

Picture Book: My Friend is Sad

Author & Illustrator: Mo Willems

Original Publisher & Date: Hyperion, 2007

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 4 and up, Pre and up

Formats other than Book: None at present

Other PBT books that connect with links to posts:

When Sophie Gets Angry… - 6/3/14

When Sophie’s Feelings… - 2/12/16        

Bear Has a Story to Tell - 6/22/14

Words are Not for Hurting - 2/16/15

A Picture Book a Day for a Year: Day 333

Dynamic Duo: Book 1

Picture Book: Toot and Puddle: You are My Sunshine 

Author & Illustrator: Holly Hobbie

Summary: It’s beautiful day, but Toot is moping. When Puddle asks about his sadness, Toot is unable to explain. When Tulip points out that the sky is blue, Puddle explains, “That doesn’t matter when you are blue too.” Toot’s moping continues, and he begins complaining to Puddle about his physical features. Puddle makes Toot’s favorite dessert and suggests an adventure, but these don’t help. Puddle invites friends over. They sing You Are My Sunshine and play a game, but Toot is still sad. On Sunday morning a severe storm comes; all are afraid but Toot. Afterwards, the air feels fresh and new, and Toot is himself again. Toot and Puddle decide that sometimes you need, “a big whopping thunderstorm to clear the air.”

Hanna’s Comments: Being able to identify and understand feelings are important social-emotional skills. Still, the source of some feelings remain a mystery. It’s also important for children to learn to accept how others are feeling and not require explanations. Everyone has a right to their own feelings and privacy. However, there is nothing wrong with offering opportunities for emotional shifts as long as no one is forced. Having a conversation about such matters would be beneficial in a classroom, religious community, or family. You can make this a theological conversation by asserting that God accepts our feelings. In fact, God made us creatures who have an assortment of feelings. God is willing to listen no matter how we are feeling. Even when we can’t put our feelings into words, just being in God’s presence in prayer will help. 

This book is a sequel to Toot and Puddle which is a wonderful book about how friendship knows no boundaries. I chose this book because I liked the way the plot carefully introduces the subject of sadness or depression to children. Tomorrow I’ll offer a second book in this PBT Dynamic Duo that is the lyrics to the song You are My Sunshine, an element of this book’s plot. Consider pairing them and having a conversation with children about feelings, particularly sadness.

Original Publisher & Date of Publication: Little, Brown, & Co., 1999

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 3 and up, Pre and up 

# of Pages: 32

Available in Spanish? Not at present 

Formats other than Book: None at present 

PBT Category: Pre 2K 

PBT Topics this Book connects with: acceptance, authenticity, brokenness, caring/tending, change, choir/music/singing/songs, companionship, depression/despair/sadness/sorrow, difficulties, emotions/feelings, encouragement, friends/friendship, fruit/fruit of the Spirit, healing/healthcare, mystery, patience, prayer, presence, rain, renewal/restoration, respect, storms, tolerance, transformation, waiting, weather  

Scripture Connections: The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed spirit. (Psalm 34:18); the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness… (Galatians 5:22); Is anyone among you hurting? Let them pray. Is anyone among you cheerful? Let them sing praise. (James 5:13)

Idea(s) for Application: This book and tomorrow’s book could be components of a lesson on feelings, particularly accepting the feelings of others and how we can always bring our feelings, even when we don’t understand them, to God.  

A Picture Book a Day for a Year: Day 316

Picture Book: Pete’s a Pizza

Author & Illustrator: William Steig

Summary: Pete is disappointed that it’s raining because he was looking forward to playing baseball with his friends. His father sees his disappointment and decides to lovingly distract Pete by making him into a pizza. When Pete’s father picks him up and places him on a table, Pete remains straight as a board (or a pizza pan). Obviously, the two have played this pretend game before! Pete’s father pretends through the various stages of pizza-making with Pete playing the part of the silent dough. Pete is kneaded, and substitute ingredients (paper shreds for cheese) are placed on him. Pete’s mother plays along in silence. Pete’s ticklishness leads to a quick break from character, but mostly he remains still, silent, and pizza-like. After being placed in the oven (on the couch) and then hand-sliced into pieces, the pizza gets up and runs way. The pizza maker chases the pizza until it is captured and hugged.  Meanwhile, the sun has come out so the pizza goes outside to look for his friends.

Hanna’s Comments: I have loved this book since the first time I read it many years ago! While reading, I suggest you frequently ask the question, “Who’s a pizza?” and then wait for your audience’s loud response. After reading this story to young children, I urge you to do your own pretend play of the stages of pizza-making with a volunteer from your audience. You may find yourself pretending to make many pizzas as each listener wants to join in the fun. How does such a silly book offer a faith lesson? It’s really quite simple. Pete’s father is a metaphor for God. I believe God sees our disappointments and lovingly interjects distractions, often in the form of others who love us. If this idea is too abstract for your children, talk about how God is the source of the love Pete’s parents demonstrate here. Loving, godly distractions help us through pain or heartache so that healing can begin. The best of those distractions come in the form of God’s loving humor and eventually, the sun does come out, circumstances change, or healing has brought us to a new place. If you explain this idea well, children will get it, and their perspective on how God loves us will be expanded, which in my view, is always a good thing.    

Publisher & Date of Publication: Scholastic, 1998

Age & Grade Appropriateness: 3 and up, Pre and up

# of Pages: 34

Available in Spanish? Not at present

Formats other than Book: video on Youtube.com

PBT Category: Pre 2K

PBT Topics this Book Connects with: affection, blessings, brokenness, depression/despair/sadness/sorrow, difficulties, disappointment, emotions/feelings, family, fathers, God’s nature, healing/health care, image of God, joy, love, parents/parental love, play, renewal/restoration

Scripture Connections: Oh Lord, you have searched me and known me! (Psalm 139:1); Behold, I am making all things new (Revelation 21:5); If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away, the new has come.

Idea(s) for Application: Read this book to a group of young children when teaching them about God’s loving ways particularly when we are disappointed by life’s circumstances.